Do You Know?

Do you know about the hell that I’ve been through?

Do you know what it feels like to be diagnosed with severe, expressive aphasia, verbal apraxia, auditory processing issues, and inability to walk?

Do you know what it feels like to not be able to talk, understand anything, or walk?

Do you know what it feels like to have to relearn your alphabet?

Do you know what it feels like to wonder about your future?

Do you know what it feels like to worry about your financial situation in the hospital?

Would we have to sell our house? Would we be bankrupt?

Do you know what it’s like to have your family worry about you?

Do you know what it’s like to see your mom cry about you?

Do you know what it’s like to build your balance and stamina in physical therapy?

Do you know what it feels like to have your hearing taken from you?

Do you know what it feels like to be on disability? The sacrifices you have to make.

Do you know what it feels like to have the ability to have children taken away from you due to financial constraints?

Do you know about the major depression and anxiety that comes with a stroke?

Do you know what it feels like when you have no purpose?

Do you know what it feels like to be fired for having a stroke?

Do you know about the drive that stroke survivors have?

FINALLY, Do you know how it feels to overcome? Do you know what it feels like to regain your speech? Do you know what it feels like to hear again? Do you know what it feels like to walk normal again?

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14 thoughts on “Do You Know?

  1. My Miracle Life October 8, 2015 / 7:53 am

    You are such an amazing woman and friend. I’m re-blogging this post to my blog so my followers can see and understand what you’ve overcome. I heart you, warrior woman!

  2. My Miracle Life October 8, 2015 / 8:01 am

    Reblogged this on My Miracle Life and commented:
    My friend and fellow stroke survivor Megan, is a recovery ROCK STAR!

    Do not tell her what she can or cannot accomplish, because she will prove you WRONG! Everything the doctors told her she couldn’t do, she’s doing.

    I’m lucky to have her fighting alongside me because, yes, I know what it feels like. Xoxoxoxo

    • StrokeFighter October 8, 2015 / 5:49 pm

      You are a rockstar as well, Eva! We will overcome.

  3. Jo Murphey October 8, 2015 / 12:49 pm

    Yes, to most of it and more! I don’t know about mom because she’s dead. I still have my hearing. Or on disability because I was denied. I can add probably twenty more “Do you know(s)” to the list.

    • StrokeFighter October 8, 2015 / 5:57 pm

      Jo, I hope things get better for you. Keep fighting for your disability rights. My employer helped me get disability because they wanted to fire me. I worked for a large defense contractor; maybe that’s a benefit I got for working for a large company.

      I’m still working on my hearing/audiological processing in an outpatient clinic. This past Jan I could process 44% of words in my left ear and 72% in my right ear. I used to not be able to hear anything in the beginning.

      • Jo Murphey October 9, 2015 / 12:28 pm

        Megan, I’ve actually given up on my disability after the lawyer and court after two and a half years. Now I’m fighting for my husband’s survivors benefits.I won’t give that up.

  4. aitcheeevee October 8, 2015 / 1:08 pm

    Your story is inspirational, truly. I take hope from your story that I may be able to reach my mum one day. She had a massive stroke last year and it feels like we lost her.She can’t talk and it’s hard to tell if she understands when we communicate with her.

    If you don’t mind, aside from your own motivation to bust your way out of this situation, what helped you make such massive strides to recover? Is there anything I could be doing to help my mum?

    Keep fighting the good fight x

    • StrokeFighter October 8, 2015 / 6:20 pm

      Does she have global aphasia? It’s where you can’t speak or understand anything. My neurologist diagnosed me with that in the beginning of my stroke.

      Can your mom write? If not, can you find ways to communicate with her through eye contact or touch.

      I’ve had four hearing evaluations since my stroke. I’ll have another one next year. If it’s possible, can you have her hearing tested?

      In the beginning of my stroke, I could write short phases and that’s how I communicated with my family and rehab professionals.

      In terms of my expressive speech issues, I did attend a good rehab 5 days a week for a year. I’m still attending outpatient speech therapy twice a week to work on my hearing/audiological processing. I’ve improved in terms of my hearing but I still have work to do to be 100%.

      Having hearing issues, I rely on eye contact and lip reading massively.

      • aitcheeevee October 9, 2015 / 5:43 pm

        Thank you for coming back to me. My mum used to be able to understand what we were saying and knew that she wasn’t responding appropriately but she lost a lot of blood recently and I think this has caused more damage. She doesn’t seem to be aware of what we say and she can only say yes or no now. I try to speak slowly but even then, it’s hard to tell if she understood. When she writes, it comes out much as her speech does, in gibberish.
        She wasn’t offered any rehab post stroke. She remained in hospital for a long time after her stroke, it seems the doctors felt that any recovery had been made during her stay and she was discharged without support. I suspect this is due to her age, 73.
        Thanks for the tip on getting her hearing tested, overall this seems to have improved compared to her pre-stroke hearing but I hadn’t considered the audiological processing. x

  5. StrokeFighter October 10, 2015 / 1:55 am

    In terms of speech, my dad would point to a part of my body and have me repeat it. Repeat “hand”, “leg”, “finger”, etc. I also did this exercise with my first and second rehab. Again, I’m no doctor but this is how I started out. This exercise addresses short-term recall.

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